Thursday, November 20, 2008

Preparation & Opportunity= Luck

"Luck is what happens when preparation meets opportunity. That comes from Seneca, the Roman philosopher who was born in 5 B.C. It'll be worth repeating for another two thousand years, at least." (Page 147, Randy Pausch's The Last Lecture.)

I read Pausch's short book this week, a gift from my Book Angel, John. (Thanks, John!) Pausch is the late Carnegie Mellon computer science professor who penned his lecture (and companion book) when he realized he had just months to live, because of pancreatic cancer. Dying before he hit age 50, and leaving three very young children, Pausch none the less experienced marvelous milestones.

One key to his personal success and happiness was that he achieved his childhood dreams. I'm writing tonight as I think about luck and childhood dreams.

My family, church and Girl Scouts led me early on into a personal identity of Citizen of the World. A childhood dream was that I could help lots and lots of people in need, that I would travel around the globe.

I loved Halloween, not just because I could be an exotic gypsy and eat unlimited chocolates, but because I collected pennies for UNICEF. I loved knowing those coins would buy vaccines and rice for children in faraway lands.

According to UNICEF, "The tradition of 'Trick-or-Treat for UNICEF' began in 1950 in the United States when Philadelphia school children first went door-to-door at Halloween collecting money in decorated milk cartons to help the world's children.

They raised a grand total of $17, kicking off a campaign that has since brought in more than $188 million to provide medicine, better nutrition, clean water, education, emergency relief and other support to children in more than 160 countries."

Another childhood dream was to bake. As a girl, one of my specialties was a kind of fried donut hole called "darned goods." (made with Bisquick and learned at Camp Merrie Woode.) I began making pies in high school with my friend Rachel Cain, and I've never stopped. Apple pies are one my standards, served to both son and husband, upon request, on their birthdays.

I considered Seneca's formula and came up with this:

Preparation: loving children of the world and baking. Working hard, being debt free and able to travel, having a husband who supports my World Citizenship.

Opportunity: my dear friend Sujata, in India, inviting me to work in her new coffee shop this winter; as a baker, with all shop proceeds supporting the poor and homeless of her nation.

Luck: I begin working in Sujata's cafe in late January 2009 in southern India.(How's this for rather astounding? Sujata's son has a PhD from the department Pausch taught in at Carnegie Mellon. I'll have to find out if he took classes from Pausch.)

Yes, this is great and good luck, but it is also something more: A BLESSING. I know I am not simply lucky. I am blessed beyond measure to live this winter in the land I love, devoting myself to others in great need, doing something incredibly fun, with a friend I love dearly. So, Seneca, I want to tamper with your formula. A blessing is what happens when preparation and opportunity meet the desires of the heart.

Thursday, November 13, 2008

Making Change: Fresh Start Day

I heard about a Halloween costume someone wore last month; a black suit with nickles, dimes and quarters glued all over it...."Change you can count on!" was what the wearer declared.
In my book, For Goodness' Sake: A Daily Book of Cheer for Nurses' Aides and Others Who Care, I wrote this entry about change for February 1:
"A new month. A perfect time for giving yourself and others a fresh start. If you're like most of us, the New Year's resolutions you made just 32 days ago have long been forgotten. It just seemed too hard to make changes, didn't it?
"Quitting smoking, being more patient, losing weight, or wrestling down the addiction alligator are never easy. In fact, when we work to improve ourselves, life can feel tough and hard.
"But like the kid who falls for the hundredth time when she's learning to ice skate, we just need to keep the faith and try again.
"What have you disappointed yourself about? When did you let yourself down? Rather than pouring your energy into guilt or worse yet, self hatred, declare today your 'fresh start day.'
"In most towns, the public library declares that one day a year, people can return library books that are incredibly overdue. Years overdue. And on that day, usually called 'amnesty day', all is forgiven. No fines are levied. The librarian is just happy to have the books back in circulation.
"Put your guilt and disappointment on the shelf and get back into circulation. Today is a grand day to begin again.
"TODAY: Make a fresh start"
But sometimes, change is just darn hard, no matter how much we say or think we want it.
I remember playing Monopoly with my brothers, it seemed I could not win. Within a few rounds of the board game, my brother Tim would own tons of property that I was forever landing on. I would end up with Baltic Avenue, or some other low priced real estate. If Tim landed on it, he would hand me a $500 bill to pay his $4 rent and sneer, "Make Change!"
Yes, MAKING CHANGE IS HARD TO DO. Particularly when it isn't your idea, you can't regulate the time or pace, and you fear your importance or involvement may be diminished in the new configuration.

Yet, when we practice the Art of Possibility, and see that nothing is stagnant, that change is constant and inevitably, great moments can occur. I believe the secret is to believe in our own ability to deal with whatever comes up...and just take the plunge. If we can believe in ourselves and confidently face the change, the experience can actually be fun. We must also believe in the very ideas we offer up: let us recognize that we are not the creator of ideas. We are merely the messengers.
Let's take a lesson from nature. Every day, the world is changing, evolving, moving from one season to another. May we move with grace from this known moment to the unknown next. And may we always remember that our views and gifts are needed by the Universe.

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Following President Obama into the Future: the healing has begun

While I was buying some tea at a health food store today, the young clerk did his darnedest to give me a discount. "Do you have a member card? Are you a senior citizen?"
I confessed to having stayed up all night watching the election celebration, and said though I might look like senior citizen, I wasn't. "But it was worth missing a night's sleep!" I said with a big smile.
"Oh yes," he smiled back. "I am glad to be an American again."
Yes! We don't have to apologize for our country anymore, having elected a man of character, a peacemaker, the Gandhi of this time in the history of the world. With Barack and Michelle Obama in the White House, we will joyfully begin to sacrifice and reduce our consumption of the world's resources, sharing with those in need. We will stop fighting wars for oil. We will treasure this precious green planet, no longer fouling our nest.
In India last winter, grocery shopping with my friend Sujata, I bought some coffee mugs with a message I adore. It says, "COSMOS. OK!"
With our new President Elect, Barack H. Obama, the Cosmos is, indeed, OK! Here my mother holds her Cosmos mug, offering a toast to the Man of the Century.
ADDENDUM, NOVEMBER 7, 2008:
Four years ago, a painful breach was healed in my own life.
In 1986, my dearest high school friend suddenly broke off all communication with me...after 16 years of very close ties. What happened? Why? She answered none of my questions, and after a while, I stopped trying.
Then, in 2004, she got back in touch, asking for my forgiveness. "I was a very moralistic young woman," she explained. "And because you were divorcing, I thought we couldn't be friends anymore."
From that moment of reconnection, our friendship was fully restored. We brought our families together, for plenty of tears and laughs. The power of this reconciliation in our lives cannot be overestimated....we felt lighter and happier.
So, what does this story have to do with President Obama's victory?
Our shame as a nation, having kidnapped Africans 200 years ago to become slaves, has been a raw, open sore on the body politic. We have lived with this terrible wrong for generations, seeing the slaves' descendents struggle to overcome this giant handicap. We knew things weren't right, but we didn't know what to do.
By electing Barrack Obama to the presidency, our wound has started to heal. Our reconciliation has begun. Opportunity for all is now a reality. And like my friend, Riikka, and I, since we restored our precious relationship in 2004, our lives are now so much richer and fuller and healthier. Hooray for Right Action!

Sunday, November 2, 2008

Halloween Couples...Magic Between Us

Can you imagine anyone cuter than Windy and her son? What a beautiful Mother and child.

And how about Red Riding Hood and her wacky friend?

What lovely nursing assistants, clearly, there are angels among us.


Another mother with her favorite cowboy and his horse.


The biker from the Bad Side asks Lovely Everetta to Dance!












Everyone, even the witches, likes to hold our miniature goat, Smokey.




Another gorgeous couple!


The three award winning costumes, and baby Smokey.
I wanted to share this Halloween Party Photo Album with you, so you can enjoy the obvious joy in relationships found at Union House. Whenever two or more are gathered, we find that spark of love and friendship bubbling over. Whether a party day or not, everyone associated with this small, comfortable nursing home can feel the intimate force of caring within our four walls. We are a nurturing community, in the fullest sense of the phrase.